Mark Twain once said, “There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man’s notion that he is less savage than the other savages.”
I was thinking about Twain’s notion above, when I considered the ‘art of civility’ among the human race.
Do you ever practice civility?
A short definition of civility explains that it is “the demonstration of polite, reasonable, and respectful behavior;” it extends beyond basic manners.
Ben Franklin offered his own take on civility ~ “Be civil to all, sociable to many, familiar with few, friend to one, enemy to none.”
And Samuel Johnson added to the ‘consequences of Incivility ~ “When once the forms of civility are violated, there remains little hope of return to kindness or decency.”(Christian Science Monitor).
So, if you consider those observations above you might better understand the importance of civility.
George Washington is one of my favorite Presidents. Maybe it’s because he was first, or maybe because he was a good example and leader, or perhaps it’s those noble traits he learned early in his life.
I went to see ‘”Young George Washington,” the movie, with my close friend, Sharon. It was a most entertaining view of an earlier George Washington, and the man who would later become President.
And part of my readings on Washington, it was revealed that as a lad of 12, he received a list of those rules of “civility” as written by the Jesuits in 1595.
Actually, these 110 “Rules of Civility & Decent Behavior in Company and Conversation” would become a guideline that would support and be part of Washington’s foundation throughout his life and leadership.
And I’m thinking here that “civility” might be learned and embraced more if all might have some exposure to this same list as Washington.
Certainly, all politicians could benefit!
May I share some of these “Rules of Civility” with you?
This list contains many lessons for the student. It reviews manners, courtesies, respect, decent behavior and how to treat people.
It is a simple approach to building character.
Although Washington, I am certain, had many flaws just like you and I, his exposure to these rules of behavior at a young age, also influenced him on his journey.
Below are but a few of this list:
Rule #1 ~ ‘Every action done in company ought to be with some sign of respect to those who are present.’
Rule #19 ~ ‘Let your countenance be pleasant but in serious matters somewhat grave.’
Rule #22 ~ ‘Show not yourself glad at the misfortune of another, though he was your enemy.’
All people and especially politicians could benefit from this one.
Rule #49 ~ ‘Use no reproachful language against anyone, neither curse nor revile.’
This one should be higher up the list.
Rule #56 ~ ‘Associate yourself with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation, for ‘this better to be alone than in bad company.’
Rule #59 ~ ‘Never express anything unbecoming, nor act against the ‘”Rules Moral” before your inferiors.’
One should always strive to maintain ethical behavior and avoid inappropriate conduct in front of subordinates. Leaders and mentors should set positive examples for all to see.
Do you know any good leaders who practice this rule?
Let us consider a few more rules of civility.
Rule #65 ~ ‘Speak not injurious words neither in jest nor earnest; scoff at none although they give occasion.’
Maybe best to ‘bite’ your tongue instead.
Rule #67 ~ ‘Detract not from others, neither be excessive in commanding.’
Rule #70 ~’Reprehend not the imperfections of others, for that belongs to parents, masters, and superiors.’
If only learning and acquisition of knowledge might help one navigate the road ahead.
Rule #73 ~ ‘Think before you speak, pronounce not imperfectly nor bring out your words too hastily, but orderly and distinctly.’
I have learned this lesson many times over during my own walk down this path, and perhaps the best lesson along the way came in my French Literature class at the Mount where I read Voltaire’s exquisite quote:
‘If you would have me understand you, speak in simple terms.’
This lesson has served me well.
Rule #89 ~ ‘Speak no evil of the absent, for it is unjust.’
In 1789, Washington carried every vote of the Electoral college and became President, the only candidate ever to do so.
When you think of integrity, duty, honor, patriotism and those virtues of life, Washington has to be near the top.
These early rules of ‘civility,’ I believe, served Washington well; they can do the same for you and me.
And besides, the world needs a little more “civility.”
Let’s do it!
